Celebrate Floors!

Tips for Holiday Floor Decorating

By Mary Mendoza

I was walking through Sears the other day when I suddenly became aware of the floor beneath my feet. It was a brilliant Colgate white. Kristi Yamaguchi could skate to another gold medal on its shiny surface. This is obviously a giant corporation that cares about its floors, I said to myself, and rushed home to spend quality time with mine.

Thanks to my association with iFLOOR.com I've developed a heightened awareness and sensitivity about floors. Floors are ignored and neglected by their owners. Most people think they can get away with a little vacuuming here, a little Mop -N- Glow there.

One shocking example of a floor slighting was the network's coverage of the 200th anniversary of the White House. Historians yammered on about the wallpaper, Truman's balcony, FDR's swimming pool, the Oval Office, and what's gone on in the Lincoln Bedroom. A grainy film clip of a breathless Jacqueline Kennedy pouring over upholstery samples was shown but nothing, zip, nada, was said about the floors!

In the recent past, I too was guilty of ignoring my floors. My fall cleaning frenzy was the first time I'd washed my Congoleum in six-months. Yet, through this simple act of cleansing I found enough money under the fridge to open a Roth IRA!

The floor apathy that grips the nation reaches its peak this time of year. You're still on a Halloween sugar high. Your head is so full of the election blitz you can't even name the president. Thanksgiving will be the same as last year; another wrestling match between you and a 24-pound turkey. Then comes the shopping, cooking and decorating for Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa. Activities you look on with all the enthusiasm of a Florida ballot counter working overtime. Your life is hectic; you're stressed. Your floor is the last thing on your mind.

Yet, look at the issue rationally, in a CNN sort of way, and ask yourself why you shouldn't devote the same amount of time and money to decorating your floor for the holidays as you would your front lawn or your mantle piece.

My staff and I did some last minute telephoning to citizens who are concerned about floors. They offer the following holiday floor decorating tips.

From Tammy in Boise: "A quick and inexpensive way to dress up your floor, be it vinyl, carpet, Pergo or sea grass, is to toss handfuls of white cotton balls about. Tell everyone they're miniature snowballs. Leave them on the floor until Easter when, furry with dust, they'll look like bunny tails."

Lynda, who lives in St. Louis, suggests stringing mini-lights around the floor baseboard. Use masking tape to match the paint or a Martha Stewart Everyday Staple Gun, depending on your budget. Or, for a truly unique look weave the lights across the floor in angel and reindeer designs. Make a game of it. Let guests pick their way through the maze of lights, and reward those who don't break any bulbs with an extra shot of eggnog.

Kathleen, a busy Boeing executive from Seattle, re-carpets her home every year, right before Thanksgiving. She looks for a Berber carpet that's the same shade as homemade turkey gravy. "It makes clean-up so much easier," she said.

Janie, an artist from Vancouver, finds that spraying all her floors with glitter adds a festive touch. "Check with your local floorist or the experts at iFLOOR.com first." she cautioned. "Glitter is hard to get out of orange shag carpeting, let me tell you!"

Barb, who goes for a more natural, Green Party-look, grows ivy topiaries at floor-level, then allows the vines to blanket the room. The down side is that she's constantly watering and fertilizing her floor. Don't try this with carpet, she advises.

Pam, a Portland homemaker, faced a real holiday dilemma. Her floor covering was a blah beige vinyl that she couldn't afford to replace. One day, while hauling out the garbage in its green Hefty bag, Pam had a brainstorm. She drove quickly to Home Depot where she purchased a half dozen red plastic tarps. She tacked them down (using a Martha Stewart Everyday Staple Gun) over the unsightly vinyl and voila! Pam's floors are not only a breeze to wash but the red plastic blends beautifully with her other seasonal decor.

If you live in the country or just wish you did, consider covering your floor with straw for a Bethlehem stable-look. Charity of Springfield, Oregon gave us this idea which offers endless decorating possibilities! Think giant palm trees, life-size cutouts of the Three Wise Men (in your living room!), a Star of Bethlehem suspended from the ceiling. Add live animals for authenticity. Again, don't try this if you have carpet.

As for me, I'm going to treat the carpets in our house with a thorough vacuuming and shampoo, set and comb out. Just in time for the holidays.

I urge all the good people of America to decorate and celebrate their floors during this joyous time of year. Give thanks to your floors for their unwavering support!

Biographical Sketch - Mary Mendoza

Madcap Mary Mendoza, formerly known as Hurricane Mary, lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband, son, three cats and 200,000 Sunset magazines.

Madcap's humor columns and feature stories have appeared in publications around the Northwest as well as online. She is the author of The Adventures of Madcap Mary, a collection of humorous stories. Madcap can be reached at mcmendoza@ispiral.com. Visit Madcap's site! http://www.madcapmary.com.